Dark and Light

My 16 year old daughter P asked me to post her poem on my blog.

Dark and Light
Snow falls. Every flake is a decision. If it shall fall on a dark spot, to cover and make brighter, or should it fall where all the others have fallen and clumped together? Dark surrounds. And drowns. It climbs and sticks to you until it brings you down and trips you.

Light is small, beautiful and illuminate. Light helps. It carries you. It holds your soul. It guides, without falling to one side nor to the other. It gives you strength until it is sure that you can walk alone.

Unholy hands

Last weekend was our youth group’s annual Snow Camp retreat. The theme this year was Encounter, and the speaker was Monty Hipp. He’s been here before, and he usually brings a powerful word. This time was no exception.

How many times I have been to these snow camps, get all prayed up and get to spend time praying with and for kids. How many times I have felt burdened in my spirit for their salvation, that they would come to know Him. Of those many, many times, I have never had a pastor or speaker address the leaders. Never has one focused on the leaders like Monty did Friday night.

“Now leaders, don’t even think about laying hands on any one of these kids, with unholy hands.” Unholy hands? This was after praise & worship, toward the end of his message, as we were beginning a time of response at the altar. I prayed the Lord would show me what in the world he was talking about. And He did.

I had never really thought about what a responsibility we have when we are put into a leadership position. I know we are the adults, therefore we are responsible, but this is different. This is a holy calling, a situation where our hearts have to be clean, ready to be the armor bearer for someone who may not even know they are in the midst of a spiritual battle. A battle for a heart and mind, and ultimately for their soul. We must be ready.

Every one of us had unholy hands that night. Every one of us had something we were holding. Something to think about or distract us, a wrong motive, or a burden which was keeping us from the priority at hand: the healing, bondage breaking, comfort and salvation of 200 teenagers. He had the leaders come forward, to the front. He and the kids prayed for US. We prayed the Lord would remove blinders and burdens, that we would bring Him all the glory as we ministered. Every one of us felt the Holy Spirit that night in such a powerful way, and as he released us to begin praying with the kids, we knew exactly what our purpose was, and our focus was true.

Praise

Lord, today I am praising you for wisdom which leads to understanding. Wisdom gained in regards to my son’s developmental delays, which is leading to understanding how he really ticks, and why. Father, thank you for always placing me right where I need to be, and for giving me the grace and strength to follow through.

Attitude

“You are God.
You command the oceans
You write on the heavens
You restore my soul
You are God.”
~Jeff Deyo

I’m up late, cleaning the kitchen and feeling sorry for myself. Why? I just feel like I have a ton of things to do, and little or no help from the household. Join me in my pity party? I don’t blame you for not. I’m listening to Jeff Deyo’s “Unveil” CD, and trying to adjust my attitude. The last thing my husband (sarcastically) said as I huffed out of the bedroom a little while ago was, “Go have your little tizzy. You’re entitled.”

Entitled? Of course I’m not! Martha was WRONG in being upset about the workload. Her priorities were skewed. Mine are…skewed? I don’t know. I just know that four teenagers, two young kids, homeschooling, and a husband has me maxed out. Jesus told Martha that Mary had chosen what was best. If Jesus were sitting here at my kitchen table, I wouldn’t have to think twice about what I need to do. Instead, I sit here alone in a half clean kitchen. The same kitchen that I have been attempting to clean since I finished canning applesauce on Sunday evening. Today is Thursday. And I’m having a pity party.

So let’s see what the Word says about this. If I start with Titus 2 I’ll just have to get back up and finish cleaning the kitchen right away. Sigh. I think I’ll look at that tomorrow. Tonight I need a pick-me-up.

Galatians 6:9 says “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”

“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31

Obviously the problem is with me, because the Lord doesn’t lie and I know those promises are for me! I love Jesus and I love my family. If you think of me this week, please pray for me. I’m tired.

“My life is not my own. My heart belongs to you alone.”
~ Jeff Deyo

Personal revenge is sin, too

“It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.”
Deuteronomy 32:35

Justice doesn’t always come swiftly. It doesn’t always come the way we wish that it would. And sometimes, in this life, justice doesn’t seem to come at all. Does that mean the offender gets off, scott-free? I don’t think so. It simply means that we need to let God deal with the offender, while we care for the victim. So often I hear of situations where there is a sin or a crime committed against another person, and the guilty one appears to receive nothing for his offense. Many times it is Christians who are the first to begin the murmuring. “Why don’t they DO something about it? Why don’t they just do (such and such) ?” Then the irritation, or even anger can begin. “If it were me, I would…!”

“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37

We can so easily be outside of a situation, or even on the outskirts of it, and feel so free to judge and convict. We give the devil a foothold in our own lives, allowing sin within ourselves, when the sin we are so irked about doesn’t even belong to us. Murmuring begins. Vengeful thoughts and nasty gossip ensue. When all along the one in control—the Judge, Jury, and Convictor—is awaiting the time to bring down His justice. Our justice cannot even come close to His holy conviction! Our gossip becomes our sin, which by no means makes us any better than the sinner amongst us. It says in Ephesians 5:12 “For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret.” Our sin overshadows what the Lord would do in us, preventing us from even being helpful to the people involved.

In the midst of just such a situation, where my husband and I are helping someone who has been tragically victimized by another, even in our home we tend to have these attitudes. Attitudes of questioning why things aren’t moving ahead like we think they should, and of wondering why the guilty party doesn’t seem more repentant, or appear to have a punishment coming. We can so easily overlook the fact that God is GOD, that He is holy, and mighty, and in complete control over the way things are unfolding. That He placed us in this person’s life for a particular reason, and that it is not our place to be the judge or convictor. We must cling to our own faith, our Lord Jesus, and demonstrate His love to this person that he has brought into our lives when they needed us the most. That is all we are required to do. What we feel helpless about, may we turn and realize that as the grace of God has been extended to us, we must do the same.

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9

God will take care of the rest.

Chosen

I am chosen. God chose me to be His child. Even now, 12 years after I gave my life to Christ, this still boggles my mind. The whole unworthiness but chosen thing has always been so hard for me to understand. My parents gave birth to me. My teachers didn’t have a choice as to which students were assigned to them. I was always the last one chosen for sports teams during PE, and even for party invitations. But God looked at me through the blood of His son, and he said “She is acceptable to me.”

I decided on the name of this blog–He Chose Me– because this is a key point of my faith in Jesus.

“For it is by Grace you have been saved, through faith, and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God. Not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8

Nothing I physically did caused God to choose me. There isn’t a way under heaven to earn God’s favor. The only way to be saved is by faith in Jesus Christ, which enables God’s grace to be given to us.

“Sure I’m a Christian. I don’t break the law or anything. I celebrate Christmas.” Well, good for you. It’s a start, but it will never be enough for a holy God, who by His very nature cannot even look upon sin. When we allow Jesus’ sacrifice to cover our sin, only then God can look upon us and give us His grace.

“You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last. Then the Father will give you whatever you ask in my name.” John 15:16

God chose me, not to just sit around and feel all holy and comfortable, but to bear fruit. My actions are the evidence of my faith, not the basis of it. I should be willing to do God’s will fully, rather than selectively. Even if it takes me out of my comfort zone.

“This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.”
John 15:7-9

By allowing God to work in my life, by using the gifts that he has given me, I am able to bear fruit. My life is so different from before I got saved! I used to struggle with the WHYS of it all. WHY did I have to live through that? WHY did I have to be that way to my parents? WHY did God let me mess up my life so badly? And then one day I decided to throw up my hands and say “OK Lord, use this for your good.” Right away He sent a troubled teenager to me, with problems specific to what I had lived through. And my testimony was shown to be valid. MY testimony helped someone strengthen her faith in God! I hadn’t realized until that point in my life, that God’s plan really is the best plan of all. I mean, I’ve known it, but it wasn’t REAL to me like it became then. The fruit in my life was evident, and was used to further God’s plan for another person. And for so many years I’d just sat on my testimony, never using it for God’s glory.

And I was chosen. Adopted, brought into the family of the kingdom of God. Not because I prayed a certain way, or dress a certain way, or pay my tithe. Not because I sing hymns, or don’t, or do community service, or have adopted kids. I was chosen because I love Jesus. And that’s enough for God.

Hello world!

I’ll work on this!! Give me a few days to transfer some posts over. This blog will focus entirely on my relationship with Christ, and Christianity-related topics.
Any posts dated older than this one are merged from my other blog.

See You At The Pole 2007

Well, I made the circuit of our three schools this morning. J wanted to go pray with her friends at the middle school, even though she doesn’t attend there, so I dropped her off and headed for high school #1 to drop off P (who also isn’t going to school today, due to a big nasty batch of pink eye!), and headed for high school #2 where G attends. I was able to get pictures at one high school & the middle school. God was moving at all three schools, with approx. 55 kids at HS #1, 17 (3 teachers and a pastor included in this count) at the middle school, and at least 75-80 at HS #2! Totally awesome! Praise music was playing at the high schools, kids had brought their guitars, and they were singing and praying, praising God.

Why stab your brother?

Recently I came across a Scripture which, although I’m sure I’ve read it many times before, I’d never noticed. It talks about gossip. Ephesians 5:12 “For it is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret.” This Scripture has literally JUMPED at me at times, when I’ve overheard or been part of certain conversations.

So many times I’ve heard it spoken or preached on that gossip is harmful. Gossip is sin! It sickens me at times, to hear the things that my fellow females say about others, whether inside or outside of the Church. To laugh sarcastically when someone’s sin is found out, or to “update” each other on “what’s happening with so and so now”. I try very hard to steer clear of these types of conversations. I am not perfect! But I do try. It frequently occurs to me that they could be talking about me this way when I’m not around too.

It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. This is talking about believers who are disobeying! Call them backslidden, or just temporarily disobedient. But they are believers! Brothers and sisters in Christ. So why do we stab each other in the back? It’s time for the Church to start behaving as Christ called us to.

“Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:25-32

There is a Reliant K song that addresses this too from The Anatomy of the Tongue in Cheek (one of my fav’s). The song “Down in Flames”… part of it goes
“The enemy is much ignored
when we fight this Christian civil war.
We’re cannibals, we watch our brothers fall
We eat our own, bones and all…
Finally fell asleep on the plane
to wake to see we’re going down in flames”
and later in the song…
“We see the problem and the risk,
but nothing’s solved.
We just say, “Tisk, tisk, tisk,”
and, “Shame, shame, shame.”
Yes, and isn’t that the very sad truth. Remember the old adage about when you point a finger at someone, you have three more fingers pointing right back at you.

Lest you cause anyone to stumble

Being a born again Christian with a past, a history of living far from God, has it’s ups and downs. I try to be careful in the way that I speak, both in the here and now and of my past. I realize that other Christians and I, although we may have common past histories, can easily cause each other to falter in even discussing our pasts. My crazy friend Kat is a great example: She and I have so much in common, we could have partied together and not even known it. When we get to talking about “before” Christ in our lives, we can get laughing about the stupid stuff, and others around may not know what in the world we’re laughing about. Why would we laugh about the past sin in our lives? But doesn’t everyone laugh at their old mistakes? Ours are just different than someone else’s. We weren’t raised in church; we didn’t cut our teeth on the church pews.

One major stumbling block for both my friend and I is music. She is ten years older than me, so her particular music set is a tad different than mine, but not entirely. Names like Pink Floyd, ACDC, the Who, and Lynrd Skynrd bring back whole floods of memories and emotions for her. For me, her list is included in mine, but add in Metallica, Ozzy Osbourne, Anthrax, Iron Maiden and the Grateful Dead. One song can set me back. Not take me back–set me back. And now, our son G (16yo) has a friend that listens to all “the old music” that Kat & I both spent our high school & beyond years listening to, and attending the concerts of.

When ever this particular boy comes over–and that is frequently–it happens. He’s a nice kid: not into drugs or parties, doesn’t lie to his parents and isn’t disrespectful. But then he loves to bring up music. His dad has a recording studio and his parents aren’t Christians. He plays guitar, and is constantly asking me “Hey, do you remember this song?” and plays it for me on guitar. I think it’s cool that he enjoys what he does (playing guitar). I am just having trouble with the whole music issue. Myself, I don’t listen to secular music. Christian music is my sanctuary–something I can surround myself with any time I want to, and be able to think and focus myself vertically, toward my heavenly Father, rather than looking back at my past. Lot’s wife turned into a pillar of salt when she looked back. While I know that I won’t become a pile of dry whiteness, I still feel like I get dragged back to “then”. And sometimes I can feel a tad dry after an extended encounter with him.

I know exactly what I was saved FROM. My life is entirely different now than it was prior to 1995, when I got saved. The Lord Jesus Christ is my Redeemer, my Savior, and my Friend. He is my Everlasting Peace, my Comforter, Keeper, and my Fortress in the time of storm. I know that this boy was placed into our lives so that we can lead him to live for the Lord. It’s just a challenge, having someone around so much who brings up my own stumbling blocks, when I am so careful to try not to do the very same thing for others around me.